Wednesday, June 11, 2014

The Effects of Being Cruelly Reduced...

Rejection happens everyday, especially to people who has diffident personality, an unusual look, unacceptable background, different belief systems/actions, or how intelligent a person is (you could be too intelligent or not intelligent enough). Rejection is powerful enough to usher years of depression and rage, especially if nothing is done about it. We have recognized lately this is an issue with our youth as a result of different killings by students who were bullied. There are a lot of campaigns and programs to help stop the bullying for children, but not for adults. As a society we’ve paid little attention to how adults bully each other. Family members, friends, co-workers, media, and even organizations do and say things to ridicule, mentally beat up, or torment others for their differences. There is a distinction when we point out things to help or diminish a person, but somehow we have found a way to blur the lines.

Judging is the core factor for bullying. People do this to help establish who is more worthy or important. Research has shown that judging and demeaning others gives bullies a boost in self-esteem, it causes them to feel more powerful and valuable as a human being. There are people who are addicted to judging and demeaning others in order to get a self-esteem rush. People are willing to judge and discount others because for some strange reason this tactic has helped them with marketing or cause others who don’t understand their true motives look up to them and consider them to be powerful or even funny. There are situations when people fear them, either way they have found a way by speaking or doing negative actions towards others to gain positive attention to self.

This note is to help those who have experienced such painful occurrence. Being cruelly reduced for whatever reason can affect anyone psyche. This form of rejection triggers most people to feel bad about themselves or causes them to respond from a place of bitterness. Today instead of feeling negative about self or feeling like a victim and having the desire to gain revenge, let’s do the opposite. If a person or family member has a habit of saying negative statements in front of others or behind your back to diminish you don’t take it personal. Know they are using you to get their self-esteem rush and this is really not your problem. If the people they speak negative to about you decide not to befriend you, see it as GREAT. Know the people that suppose to be in your life will be there. Plus you only want a person who loves you for you and not based on how others perceive you. If you are having difficulties with letting go of your anger, bitterness, fantasies of revenge, or depression due to this form of rejection please speak with your therapist to help you process your feelings and help you release any negative emotions.

Be encourage and always take steps to become or maintian mentally & spiritually health...

Written by Nancia Leath, MA LPC NCC – © 2014 All rights reserved

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